I hate my computer. It doesn't work. It’s slow and the letters I type appear 6 seconds after I type them fso I am just going to type this shit and not proofready shits because I don’t give a fuck about my fucking computers shit shits thsis.

Okay. I’m okay now.

dj berndt kindly nominated my story The Nurse and The Patient for Dzanc Best Of The Web. so thanks to dj. The other nominees are:

When We Take Off Our Heads by J.A. Tyler

Bernhard Goetz by Sam Pink

They are both very good. Read them.

Also – I "think" you will “enjoy” THIS if you "love" or "hate" or "love/hate" "using quotation marks" around every "goddamn" word.


  1. DJ and I are getting a divorce over this. I hope you can give him good sex.


  2. giving good sex is the only way i know how to get work accepted by anyone.

  3. i will start a zine and solict you straight away.

  4. I should start another zine called "I Started This Zine To Get Laid More"

  5. i'll try to send you something long.

  6. shuttup DJ. We're on "the outs" now. Have fun fucking Adam and Sam Pink.