20110928

i started posting rumors a couple months ago. i kept @ it until i hit 100. 100 rumors seemed like a good place to stop. some are true. some i made up. some i heard through the grapevine y'all. i have assembled all of them together today/forever for you/your pleasure/despair:
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1. marilyn manson auditioned for the karate kid
2. bill gates bought out the hobby lobby
3. john travolta never proved anybody wrong
4. eric clapton dated nancy kerrigan
5. ryan gosling wears prosthetic testicles
6. murphy brown bruised madonna in a catfight
7. wolf blitzer knows how to handstand
8. linsey lohan has a fred flinstone fetish
9. alicia keys scored a 1600 on her SATs
10. johnny depp runs a kangroo farm
11. gene hackman is a born-again christian
12. tom brokaw is three-quarters choctaw
13. dolly parton maintains a cactus garden
14. carson dailey is addicted to glue sniffing
15. al bundy and ted bundy are distant relatives
16. joaquin phoenix has never been to arizona
17. sean penn suffers with arthritis & bone spurs
18. dakota fanning is a habitual bedwetter
19. gwen stefani delivered little caesars pizzas
20. owen wilson conquered juvenile diabetes
21. tom brady's twin sister is morbidly obese
22. cameron diaz had a baby with bo jackson
23. tom cruises’ wedding was b.y.o.b.
24. harrison ford wears a retainer at night
25. celine dion is an accomplished sou chef
26. frank sinatra spread bedbugs in hoboken
27. aaron neville had his stomach stapled
28. justin bieber gave the clap to miley cyrus
29. wade boggs is a devout latter day saint
30. zach morris struggles with halitosis
31. paul mccartney has mature cataracts
32. bono wears blood diamonds
33. mark wahlberg has lupus
34. stevie wonder can dunk a basketball
35. heath ledger was allergic to wheat
36. luke perry hates sweating
37. george michael has stretch-marks
38. bruce hornsby shot tupac
39. paula cole caught rabies from a beaver
40. shirley temple [censored]
41. jack black is a certified wet-nurse
42. kathy griffin polyurethanes her checkles
43. ryan phillippe claims he's a kennedy
44. the rock has gout & alopecia
45. val kilmer is an icelandic citizen
46. tony hawke played drums in hoobastank
48. snookie is barren
49. the baldwin brothers [censored]
50. bonnie raitt dated michael eisner
51. jason bateman shops at jcpenny
52. sarah michelle gellar is a blackbelt
53. steve urkel contracted lyme disease
54. john denver married a sherpa queen
55. dustin hoffman is related to thomas edison
56. ben affleck has west nile
57. the kardashians can't swim
58. jenny mccarthy lost her sex drive
59. ke$ha waterboarded her mother's tabby
60. hugh jackman has dyslexia
61. vince vaughn can pirouette 720 degrees
62. john stamos tried out for the vikings
63. bruce willis gargles viles of strychnine
64. shaquille o'neal is afraid of heights
65. clint eastwood collects asian antiques
66. tara reid screws minor league pitchers
67. juels verne had a rapture phobia
68. ellen degeneres was hooked on dope
69. chelsea clinton has a club foot
70. jay cutler plays the two-bit fiddle
71. megan fox had a stillborn baby in cancun
72. nick cage's real name is nolan dolan
73. steven spielburg lives in a cabin on a lake
74. haley joel osment turned thirty-seven
75. oprah reduced her heart attack risk by 30%
76. tyrese was conceived in a kmart dressing room
77. chelsea handler ribbits in her sleep
78. blake lively contracted poison ivy
79. halle berry has a venezuelan chauffeur
80. orlando bloom is allergic to tree pollen
81. gwyneth paltrow likes scratchy pajamas
82. angelina jolie farted in africa
83. ryan renyolds survived polio
84. rob lowe wears a sharktooth necklace
85. leann rimes is tone-deaf
86. shoeless joe jackson trained in reeboks
87. bing crosby owned a tattoo parlor
88. bill cosby is obsessed with croquet
89. susan sarandon loves the feel of sandpaper
90. patrick dempsey never says 'thank you'
91. macaulay culkin is a lesbian
92. anne hathaway had a blood transfusion
93. don cheadle eats grubs and boll weevils
94. jon voight butt-dialed spike lee
95. seal hunts bison with a spear
96. kristy alley hates kelly kowpiski
97. fergie armwrestles like a hogan
98. kate hudson maced her husband
99. mila kunis is a rare venereal disease
100. flea hotboxed a police checkpoint

4 comments:

  1. This is a gift. Especially the part about Jon Voight butt-dialing Spike Lee.

    ReplyDelete
  2. i ain't sayin' it's tru but i heard it happened.

    ReplyDelete
  3. i hear michael j fox is a world champion jenga player...

    ReplyDelete